...things like this are... why it was hard for me to believe that it was really you, at first.
[a slight shake of his head.]
When I heard what happened, and no one admitted to killing her, I thought that someone had taken it into their own hands and was refusing to face what they did. That they were willing to kill her, but not willing to take responsibility.
[ a little laugh. no he is going to take SO much responsibility. god. he's tearing up a little, just kind of - relieved, at being able to finally say something about it, and he lifts a hand to rub at his eyes. ] It's - it's been very hard not to say anything. I've had to slip away from larger conversations too many times, lest I blurt something out. I'm looking forward to when she's returned to us, so I can finally confess to it all.
I'm sorry. I - the last thing I ever wanted was for you to be disappointed in me, Mathis. [ ... ] May I ask, now... how you knew?
She was my friend. So when I thought that was the case, I needed to know. I needed to at least try, for her sake, even though it relied on being lucky.
[after a pause, a few moments of hesitation:]
The monster that I have is a manticore. I can see a conversation that someone had, on a given day.
surprise flickers across his face - and then he smiles a little, and bows his head. ]
… thank you, for entrusting me with such a thing. [ that knowledge - knowing a monster is preciously important, after all. ] That was clever of you, too.
I… wanted to ask her, first. I wanted to include her in the conversation of what to do, but… that didn’t happen.
[ his brow knits together into sorrow, and he shakes his head. ] I’m sure she will have many words for me come Monday. But, that she can have them at all is a blessing that I am more than willing to take all the heat for.
Yes. I'm sorry about the other night-- I went to Monsieur Gale first, and he asked me not to speak about it yet, so I hadn't had the chance to say anything to you.
It didn't feel right to pretend that everything was exactly as usual.
[ no worries there, either. he smiles a little further, dipping his head to acquiesce. just kind of blatantly relieved. it's been really, really hard keeping this secret, and there are no words for how much relief he feels that mathis gets to know. ]
I must ask, of course, that you keep this as secret as possible - though, I know that you will. This information must stay between us, just... just until it's done.
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[a slight shake of his head.]
When I heard what happened, and no one admitted to killing her, I thought that someone had taken it into their own hands and was refusing to face what they did. That they were willing to kill her, but not willing to take responsibility.
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[ a little laugh. no he is going to take SO much responsibility. god. he's tearing up a little, just kind of - relieved, at being able to finally say something about it, and he lifts a hand to rub at his eyes. ] It's - it's been very hard not to say anything. I've had to slip away from larger conversations too many times, lest I blurt something out. I'm looking forward to when she's returned to us, so I can finally confess to it all.
I'm sorry. I - the last thing I ever wanted was for you to be disappointed in me, Mathis. [ ... ] May I ask, now... how you knew?
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[after a pause, a few moments of hesitation:]
The monster that I have is a manticore. I can see a conversation that someone had, on a given day.
I saw... I saw it all, Rondo.
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surprise flickers across his face - and then he smiles a little, and bows his head. ]
… thank you, for entrusting me with such a thing. [ that knowledge - knowing a monster is preciously important, after all. ] That was clever of you, too.
I… wanted to ask her, first. I wanted to include her in the conversation of what to do, but… that didn’t happen.
[ his brow knits together into sorrow, and he shakes his head. ] I’m sure she will have many words for me come Monday. But, that she can have them at all is a blessing that I am more than willing to take all the heat for.
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[now that he knows-- he'd have trusted it was fine, if he had any idea, but.
it was a good idea given what he knew at the time.]
...I hope that it works out.
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[ baby. he reaches up and rubs at his own eyes a little bit - gods, but it has been a day. ]
And I do, as well. [ it better. at least. a hesitant pause, and then: ] Are... we alright?
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It didn't feel right to pretend that everything was exactly as usual.
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[ no worries there, either. he smiles a little further, dipping his head to acquiesce. just kind of blatantly relieved. it's been really, really hard keeping this secret, and there are no words for how much relief he feels that mathis gets to know. ]
I must ask, of course, that you keep this as secret as possible - though, I know that you will. This information must stay between us, just... just until it's done.