as mathis is talking, he might be able to see it out of the corner of his eye - rondo's smile breaks across his face as he reaches the end, warming up his entire expression as he details his realization.
because he has seen those things. for not the first time, rondo thinks of that moment in hell, where mathis looked the devil in the eye and chose hope. for not the first time, there's a swelling sense of - pride, for him, for all the growth he's done despite all the horrors and agonies of this place. growth, his growth. not influenced by the false butler, by false memories.
he leans over a little and nudges his shoulder into his as he says it, a light, playful jostle, and smiles down at mathis after, his expression just overwhelmingly warm and affectionate and proud. i'm proud to know you, all over his face. ]
That's exactly right. [ yours. your memories. your love. your feelings. your humanity. ] And every experience that you have here - good and bad - they are your experiences to have, and yours alone. So that you could have such a positive one, even if it wasn't returned...
[ he trails off, and just makes a little ah! noise, like he can't even get the words out. because he can't!! ] I'm so happy for you to have had it. I'm so proud of you, you know: it takes a lot of courage to continue to wade into those waters. It's the most human thing there possibly is.
[he smiles a little brighter with that nudge, nearly laughing, though he does stifle it for the most part.
this is exactly what he means when he says-- rondo is a warm person. bright, and kind, and affectionate; he is, mathis thinks, something like the sort of person that he'd like to be. (he wonders briefly whether he might love him a little too, in a way.)]
I've been trying to. It can be intimidating, at times, but I think... I like to think that I'm different from the person I was when I came here.
[that he's grown. become more himself, someone uniquely 'mathis'.
but it's after this that he rests a hand on rondo's wrist, gently touching the ribbon.]
Is this new? I don't think that I've seen you wear it.
[ cute. it's nice to see him brighter - especially after that conversation about the curses? so he's glad to see mathis warm up again. ]
I think you are, too. I mean, the first day we were here, you ran away from me! And now look at us, we can sit here and talk as if we've known each other for a lifetime.
[ and that's a big deal!!! it makes him really happy. he's so glad to have known mathis, and glad to know him now.
but! ah!! the question has him blink, looking down at his wrist and turning it a little. the ribbon is pink JK ITS PINK I HAD TO ASK ]
This? Oh! No, no. Marina gave it to me a few weeks ago! When Miss Laudna had us all play that game. She was just teasing me, I think, but she said it was a 'protection charm', so that I could swear and play along. I didn't, of course, because I wouldn't, but...
[ well. his smile softens a little as he turns his wrist. ] ... well, the sentiment behind such a thing is nice, isn't it? That someone wants to protect you.
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as mathis is talking, he might be able to see it out of the corner of his eye - rondo's smile breaks across his face as he reaches the end, warming up his entire expression as he details his realization.
because he has seen those things. for not the first time, rondo thinks of that moment in hell, where mathis looked the devil in the eye and chose hope. for not the first time, there's a swelling sense of - pride, for him, for all the growth he's done despite all the horrors and agonies of this place. growth, his growth. not influenced by the false butler, by false memories.
he leans over a little and nudges his shoulder into his as he says it, a light, playful jostle, and smiles down at mathis after, his expression just overwhelmingly warm and affectionate and proud. i'm proud to know you, all over his face. ]
That's exactly right. [ yours. your memories. your love. your feelings. your humanity. ] And every experience that you have here - good and bad - they are your experiences to have, and yours alone. So that you could have such a positive one, even if it wasn't returned...
[ he trails off, and just makes a little ah! noise, like he can't even get the words out. because he can't!! ] I'm so happy for you to have had it. I'm so proud of you, you know: it takes a lot of courage to continue to wade into those waters. It's the most human thing there possibly is.
no subject
this is exactly what he means when he says-- rondo is a warm person. bright, and kind, and affectionate; he is, mathis thinks, something like the sort of person that he'd like to be. (he wonders briefly whether he might love him a little too, in a way.)]
I've been trying to. It can be intimidating, at times, but I think... I like to think that I'm different from the person I was when I came here.
[that he's grown. become more himself, someone uniquely 'mathis'.
but it's after this that he rests a hand on rondo's wrist, gently touching the ribbon.]
Is this new? I don't think that I've seen you wear it.
no subject
I think you are, too. I mean, the first day we were here, you ran away from me! And now look at us, we can sit here and talk as if we've known each other for a lifetime.
[ and that's a big deal!!! it makes him really happy. he's so glad to have known mathis, and glad to know him now.
but! ah!! the question has him blink, looking down at his wrist and turning it a little. the ribbon is pink JK ITS PINK I HAD TO ASK ]
This? Oh! No, no. Marina gave it to me a few weeks ago! When Miss Laudna had us all play that game. She was just teasing me, I think, but she said it was a 'protection charm', so that I could swear and play along. I didn't, of course, because I wouldn't, but...
[ well. his smile softens a little as he turns his wrist. ] ... well, the sentiment behind such a thing is nice, isn't it? That someone wants to protect you.